Friday, 21 February 2014

TALES FROM A CAR PARK

Being the first person in a fourteen passenger bus, set to go from Akure to Ile-Ife, if nothing else, was a disaster.
I thought I would be in Ife by 1pm as I already promised a friend. I got to the park at some minutes past 11am and as I saw the empty bus that is to be the next bus going to Ife, I hesitated but the driver said, ‘’no worry, one bus just comot from here now, soon passengers go soon fill am.’’ I was a fool to believe him.
I sat down in the bus for like ten minutes and true to his words, a man came in. Fat, wearing a Rick Ross t-shirt, having blood-shot eyes and black lips that testified of smoking. I nodded to him, I don’t know why I did, out of courtesy perhaps or just to buy myself some insurance peradventure hell broke loose. That wasn’t enough though, I moved my bag two seats backward to put more space between me and uncle Rozay; that was the biggest mistake of all.
 Twenty minutes into the move, a middle-aged dark skinned woman boarded the bus with large dry cow-skin in tow. The smell filled the bus like a wave from the incinerator, I quickly covered my nose and turned back to see flies perch on the dry ponmo. More than I pitied the would-be eaters for probable diarrhea, I pitied myself for being stuck with the terrible smell when the bus was still as good as empty. The woman came to sit by me, I could not change seats again and when she saw my hand stamped forcibly on my nose, she said, ‘’Anh anh aunty, it’s not smelling now, ko run….’’ I nodded but my hands remained where they were.
Tick, tock, tick, tock, the time read twelve and no other passenger came in. Mallams came by to sell their watches, Ice-cream boys, bread sellers and candy sellers. One candy seller was foolish enough to drop his stuff with uncle Rozay at the front saying he would soon be back. Uncle Rozay nodded, he took two sachets of candies, looked back and saw my unapprovingly face. He shrugged and said ‘’what? Na for free I go watch am?’’ the woman beside me said in a whisper, ‘’Ole.’’ Something that must not be said in an octave pitch. I caught her cue and returned my own face to its default settings - that which was irritated by ponmo smell, not shop-lifting.
Twelve- twenty, a fine man in a shirt and plead trousers came in - not too fine but would do for sapiosexuals- and sat in the passenger’s seat. Two minutes into his arrival, he was complaining about the empty seats. He called someone on the phone, asking for an alternative bus that plies the Ife route. The person at the other line didn’t seem to have a solution. He was still on the phone when an old man in sneakers arrived wanting to share the passengers’ seat with him. The younger man allowed the old man in. he sat in the front contented, and I made the mental note to count. Five. Almost good.
I watched as the driver and the conductor depleted from shouting ‘’Ile-Ife, Ile-Ife, Ile-Ife...’’ To ‘’le-fe, le-fe, le-fe,’’ swallowing the I’s in a hurry as the sun shone furiously down on them. Their efforts seemed to all be in vain because all the people arriving in the park were traveling to Ibadan and slowly the Ibadan bus was filling up for the second time since I came.
The old man in the front noticed this and whatever comfort he felt at the front was lost as he dove for the Ibadan bus. I cursed the sneakers that made him walk away his loyalty.  Then we became four. Horrible.
Two passengers came in after then, like a way of the universe complementing its loss. A boy and a girl, holding hands and unashamed of their public display of affection. They sat next to uncle Rozay and giggled and nibbled on their ice-creams while uncle Rozay watched. I feared for their souls.
At quarter to two, I became apprehensive, I was supposed to be in Ife by now and so I shouted at the driver ‘’Oga, what happened to ‘passengers go soon fill am.’?’’ He smiled, those brown teeth that had endured countless years of cola displayed to cajole me, ‘’Anh, anh, aunty, have patience now. Enh, be mama patience.’’ That didn’t help, I hissed, brought out a book to read but the ponmo smell won’t let me.
The Ibadan bus departed and that showered in some heavenly blessings. A boy came in, wouldn't sit until the bus was ready to leave because of the smell and so he dropped his bag. But still, we were seven. Another man came in with his travelling bag on his shoulder, eight. A girl in long braids came in, nine. A girl with badly bleached skin who would rather join Ife bus than be the first in the next Ibadan bus came in, ten.
And then, the showers of blessings stopped. The young man in the passenger’s seat asked the driver if he could leave now and forfeit the remaining four, the driver said, ‘’no way! He go full Oga, patience.’’
With patience, at ten minutes to three, two people came in. then, we became twelve. Then, the ponmo woman beside me received a call, ‘’Oloribuku!’’ she barked into the phone, ‘’you better bring me my money or Sango will fire you!’’ everyone turned back to see the woman. She shrugged, unapologetic and then turned to tell a sorry tale about a customer that my impatient ears just won’t hear.
While she told her tale, a woman with a crying baby came in. we were thirteen and so, the girl with the badly bleached skin opted to pay for the last seat. I was glad and grateful to her, only to learn that the lovey-dovey boy at the front wasn’t travelling to Ife. Uncle Rozay became mad, he growled in all his maleness, the boy fled for his life.
It was then that I remembered that I wanted to buy bread for my eager friend back in Ife. I alighted the bus, happy for the fresh air I breathed in. I came back to see that two passengers had come. The bus wanted to leave without me. I took a page out of uncle Rozay’s book and roared, shouted and defended my right to be on that bus. I was surprised to see uncle Rozay take my side. I took my rightful seat while I pitied the man who had to wait for another bus of Ife. ‘’May he have better luck than I did,’’ I prayed.
And so it was, at three-thirty pm, the bus roared to life, waves of fresh air gushed in, and mama ponmo said, ‘’let us pray…,’’



Tuesday, 28 January 2014

The break up; my achy heart

I'm still twenty and I'm no longer in a relationship. Barely a month after I started dating this awesome guy, I got dumped. Since this is the first time in my life this is happening to me, I feel so horrible. I always do the dumping, now i'm being dumped. No, this is not about my ego, this is about the pain i feel about loosing someone i love. It sucks and it hurts. it's like forcefully removing two gummed piece of cotton and not minding the damage, wool flying all around and oh the mess! I literally hold my chest sometimes to make sure my heart isn't falling out. The shock to realize that suddenly he is no more part of your life, the things you wanna tell him then hang up when you remember you can't call him and the anger you feel towards him for not realizing all these and not giving you a benefit of the doubt. I've gone over and over in my mind and read over and over the chats that lead to the break up and the more i read, the more my heart breaks. He says we have different beliefs (I'm feminist, I believe in equality for everybody and I have a very shaky relationship with God-if any) and so it will be a problem in the future; if we can't have the future, then we can't have now. How come everybody gets his point but not me? And maybe they are right and he is doing both of us a huge favor but there is nothing favorable about how I feel. Somehow and sometime soon I hope to come to terms with dealing without him and going back to my default settings but now I'm allowed to mourn the absence of my friend and love, his laughter, his teasing and the daily chats.

Now that I'm 20

NOW THAT I'M 20 I turned 20 a few days ago and I didn't feel any different than I felt when I was 19. In fact, a day after I clocked 20, I still cried over a trivial issue as I used to when I was a teenager. There was no life changing occurrence that marked my twentieth birthday, no fireworks, no amazing record of accomplishments; I didn't even get a cake! I was however nostalgic on the eve of my birthday being my last day as a teenager. I spent the day mainly surfing the social networks. I remember tweeting 'my last day as a teenager #mixedfeelings' and I didn't get any retweet and nobody replied me either but I did myself a favor by clicking the favorite button. In my own way just like the rest of my generation, I documented the last few minutes of my teenage life on twitter. However as the clock clicked signaling the dawn of a new day, I had loyal friends who stayed awake just to wish me a happy birthday and I felt so lucky because deep down I knew I had people who cared about me. I might not have accomplished a lot during my teenage years (if you do not count the many novels I’ve read and the many TV soaps I’ve seen) but I do give myself some credit for having the kind of friends I do. Ever since my birthday I’ve been faced with what my life should mean now. How more responsible I should be, the kind of daughter, sister, friend and girlfriend I should be. And oh yes, I said 'girlfriend'! At the dawn of my 20th birthday I officially started dating this cute boy I’ve known for a while. He is amazing in so many ways and I feel lucky to have him. However responsibility is still the issue for me. I get mad when I have to do anybody else chores with mine, I only do some of my works when the clock is about to run out on me and yes, I’m very scared of the unknown. And being twenty means that the excuses I had for being these things and more are gone. Now, I’m scared I might not get my mom to make 'the adolescence' excuse for my inabilities again and really treat me for the adult that I am. Believe me, as much as I craved adulthood and demanded to be treated like one during my teenage years, I still liked the fact that I could misbehave and it would be chunked up on the account of my childishness. And now, I do not have that luxury anymore, nobody would account my misgivings for childishness but foolishness. Yesterday I did some net surfing about what it means to be twenty and I got some interesting results. I read on Forbes what twenty year old people should know and I diligently read it. The more I read, the more confused I became; I felt these people expect an awful lot from twenty year olds! Saving? Not letting my material needs equal my financial income? C'mon! I don't even have an official financial income, my parents still reimburse me, and I spend most of my day worrying about my GPA! I think that article should be for twenty one year olds. At least from now till my twenty first birthday, I could read it more diligently and make more sense of it and I won't feel so at loss. The more interesting article I found is the coming of age celebration for Japanese twenty year olds. Reading it, I envied the Japanese. If I was Japanese, at least someone would take my twentieth birthday serious like I do. Here, people are just waiting for me to turn twenty one. Apart from the fact that there might be a big party I would be a university graduate (if ASUU doesn’t mess with that) and life as I know it would end. The life as I know it is however still very much confused now that trying to decipher it seems to be a waste of time. I’ve however decided to be simply excellent. I would be the best daughter I could be, the best sister there is (this would be rather difficult), the best friend, the best girlfriend, the best student and the best twenty year old I could afford to be. I realize time is fast ticking, why not make the best use of the next one year before life as I know it might officially end.